Did I Say That?!

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By Paul Dugan, Groovy Reflections Team Member

Sometimes the things we say can be hurtful, even though we don’t intend them that way.
   
Nowadays people hit send on their email and then try to claw through the monitor to get it back, because they sent it to the wrong person, or realize too late that cussing out the boss wasn’t such a good idea!

In the old days it was like that, only it was SPOKEN words we wanted to take back.
 
Back in college I was on a couple of sports teams. I was by no means a star athlete or anything but good enough to be on the teams and that was enough for me. Problem: Sports team schedules don’t always follow the academic calendar; often times I would be stuck all alone in my dorm room, while my roommates and friends were off on a long weekend. This, unfortunately, included any possible female companionship.

One weekend I was alone when a team mate, Bill, came by and asked me if I’d double date with him. I explained the dilemma of all the young ladies I knew were gone! Bill said, no problem, he’d have his girl, Daphne fix me up with someone. Now why do those words, even now, send a chill up my spine? I said “Sure, Why not?”

So that night we went to the girl’s dorm to pick up Daphne and my “blind date”, Jane. There’s that chill again! And it wasn’t that bad; she had a great personality and was not at all unattractive. Maybe not the kind of girl I would normally date but certainly a nice girl. We had an enjoyable evening at the drive in. Not what you think! In those days you could go to a drive in and pay by the carload (lots cheaper than the movies) and we had a good time. We dropped the girls off at the end of the evening and that was that!

 Or was it?

Some months later a similar situation occurred. A different friend, Ron, offered to have his girlfriend, Jacquelyn fix me up. We arrived at the dorm to pick up Jacquelyn and my “blind date”. Gotta do something about the draft in here; feeling a chill again. I proceeded to do the gentlemanly thing by introducing myself. Then she said “Of course I know you; we met before.”

We had?! Okay, you could see this coming but I didn’t; it was of course the girl I’d gone out with months before. Jane!

Before I could stop it my mouth started talking! I said (and I am not at all proud of this), “I remember! You’re the girl I went out with the last time I couldn’t get anyone else!”

No wait! Can I have those words back, please?

Jane burst into tears and went running back upstairs. Jacquelyn shot Ron and I a very evil look and ran after Jane. Ron looked like he wanted to cause me serious pain. Me? I was trying to see if I could hide under the carpet.
   
I never got the opportunity to apologize to Jane, so if you’re reading this, please forgive me; I never meant it the way it came out. Ron never talked to me again either.
   
I guess if there’s a moral to this story it’s think before you speak or hit send. I don’t have a lot of regrets in my life but as insignificant as it may be in the grand scheme of things, this was one.

Note: Names have been changed to protect the innocent.

You Want Romantic, I'll Give You Romantic!

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By Paul Dugan, Groovy Reflections Team Member

Yes. It happened. I was accused of not being romantic! Personally, I have no idea where this obvious misconception comes from. Perhaps it's the fact that I use terms such as “Valentines Day, Bah Humbug!” or my personal favorite “The only person to ever celebrate Valentines Day correctly, was Al Capone”.

Because I see one day out of the year as distasteful and the most commercialized day of the year, does not mean I'm not romantic, and I can prove it.

Every year, for 40 years now, I have remembered and celebrated the anniversary of my first date with my wife! How many guys do that? But still I hear “you’re just not romantic”! I am romantic; I tell you!

Maybe this story will convince you.....about ten years ago a friend and co-worker won a free night’s stay for two at the local Inn and didn't want to use it so offered it to me for free. I gladly accepted and thought, I'll take my wife for a romantic night out, it's 100, maybe 150 yards, from the house but it's the thought that counts right?

Okay, it was free, I know, I have to do better than that, but there's more. I scheduled it for the first week in June, which is coincidentally, when our wedding anniversary is. But I wasn't done, remember, I'm being romantic here. I also scheduled a full fancy dress dinner. Yep, suit and tie, the whole nine yards AND, I paid for the meal. How's that for romantic?

I'm not done yet. I happen to know my wife likes all things Victorian so I purchased an antique Victorian diamond ring! That's romantic, but I still wasn't done yet.

While doing some community theatre shows I had the opportunity to dine at the Inn previously, my wife had not. I was well acquainted with the innkeeper and asked her if she'd help with my romantic plan. I gave her the ring with the plan that at the end of the meal we would order dessert and she would bring the dessert with the ring as the centerpiece. Now, you gotta admit, that's romantic!

The big night was here; we checked into the Inn, went to our room and got ready for our fancy dinner! I was sure to compliment her on how beautiful she looked. We were acting like school kids and she was obviously having a great time. All was going to plan; I would end the “he's not romantic” thing once and for all!

We went down to the restaurant and were seated by the waitress, I, being a gentleman, held the chair for my wife, okay I was laying it on thick, but I was determined! The dinner was excellent. At the end of the meal the waitress came over to take our order for dessert. Having eaten there before, I told my wife “You have to have their strawberry shortcake, its fantastic”. My wife said “No thanks, I don't want dessert”.

What! “This is our special night. You have to have some dessert.” She said, “No I don't want any dessert”, in a tone that clearly meant “end of conversation”! The waitress discreetly excused herself, while I panicked and I did the only thing I could think of. I grabbed my beer swallowed it in two gulps and said, “I need another beer”, then quickly got up and headed into the bar area. Fortunately this is not an unusual occurrence and my wife never wondered why I didn't wait for the waitress to come back.

Got to the bar and told the bartender “I need another beer” Hey, that's what I came in here for; got to make it believable. Oh yeah, I also said “tell the innkeeper we need to switch to plan B”. The bartender asked “What's plan B?”  I calmly replied “How the hell do I know? I came up with plan A”! I was running out of romantic here!

The Innkeeper came thru with flying colors; I went in and sat down with my drink. A few minutes later the Innkeeper herself walked in and placed a plate in front of my wife. On the plate was a large flower and in the center of the flower was...The Diamond Ring! My wife was speechless, out of the corner of my eye I could see the entire staff of the Inn peeking around the corner at my wife's tears of joy!

I still refuse to celebrate Valentines Day and you know what? People still say I'm not romantic, but, I don't care anymore, because I got to see something in my wife's eyes that night that said “Oh Yeah! He's romantic”!  And that's all I need!


By Paul Dugan, Groovy Reflections Team Member www.groovyreflections.com